Tales That Witness Madness (1973) Director:Freddie Francis
Writer:Jennifer Jayne (writer)
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Cast (Cast overview, first billed only)
Kim Novak ... Auriol Pageant (segment 4 "Luau")
Georgia Brown ... Fay Patterson (segment 1 "Mr. Tiger")
Joan Collins ... Bella Thompson (segment 3 "Mel")
Jack Hawkins ... Dr. Nicholas
Donald Houston ... Sam Patterson (segment 1 "Mr. Tiger")
Michael Jayston ... Brian (segment 3 "Mel")
Suzy Kendall ... Ann / Beatrice (segment 2 "Penny Farthing")
Peter McEnery ... Timothy Patrick (segment 2 "Penny Farthing")
Michael Petrovitch ... Kimo (segment 4 "Luau")
Donald Pleasence ... Prof. R.C. Tremayne
Russell Lewis ... Paul Patterson (segment 1 "Mr. Tiger")
Leslie Nunnerley ... Vera (segment 4 "Luau") (as Lesley Nunnerley)
Leon Lissek ... Keoki (segment 4 "Luau")
Mary Tamm ... Ginny Pageant (segment 4 "Luau")
David Wood ... Tutor - Phillipe (segment 1 "Mr. Tiger")
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The portmanteau/anthology format is very hit and miss with many examples of the genre having at least one weak tale hidden amongst the good ones, or vice versa. Tales That Witness Madness, however, is fairly unique in that every segment—including the bizarre wraparound story—is a dud, meaning that usually dependable horror director Freddie Francis and his seasoned cast of character actors can do very little to prevent the film from being a crushing bore.
Jennifer Jayne's nonsensical script sees Dr. Nicholas (Jack Hawkins) arriving at a futuristic hospital for the insane, where psychiatrist Dr. R.C. Tremayne (Donald Pleasance) is convinced that he has discovered what caused four of his patients to go mad. In order to convince his doubtful colleague, he recounts the details of each case: loony number one is Paul (Russell Lewis), a young boy whose imaginary friend Mr. Tiger proves to be very real indeed, devouring the lad's constantly bickering parents; patient number two, Timothy Patrick (Peter McEnery), loses his marbles after taking a trip into the past on a supernatural penny-farthing that is controlled by the ever-changing portrait of his Uncle Albert; fruitcake three, Brian (Micheal Jayston), kills his gorgeous wife (Joan Collins) in order to get it on with the malevolent tree trunk he brings into his home; and the last nutter is literary agent Auriol Pageant (Kim Novak) whose latest client, Hawaiian writer Kimo (Micheal Petrovitch), is planning a special feast with Auriol's tasty teenage daughter as the main course.
After telling his unbelievable (and dreadfully dull) tales to a still sceptical Dr. Nicholas, the seemingly unhinged Tremayne is escorted to one of his own padded cells; shortly thereafter, Dr. Nicholas is paid a visit by Mr. Tiger!!! Dull, uninspired and cursed with some very lame 'twist' endings, this collection of dreadful tales offers horror fans very little to get excited about—with the exception of one scene that may be of particular interest to Evil Dead fans: Joan Collins' character is attacked by trees and creepers in the middle of a forest, the branches ripping off her clothes and groping her (body double's?) breasts. Sound familiar?
3.5 out of 10, rounded up to 4 for presence of the lovely Joan Collins.